fossil

...and in other news:

"excavation continues

at what some

archaeologists

are describing as

a soul-cave.

researchers say a

fossil found at the site

suggests some type

of creative activity

took place there."

the fountain

an aquifer of tears

feeds this fountain

the first time i drank here

i did not know its source,

i only knew my thirst

soul tending

i tend my soul

as i would a fire

prodding, poking

banking, stoking

adding what is needed

at any given time

then gazing deep

into the flames

i listen to the

song she sings

ecdysis

if i were an arthropod

i'd most likely molt

rainbow exoskeletons

if i were a snake i'd shed

kaleidoscopic skins

but my blood is warm

and my ecdysis

takes a different form

dreaming woman

o honey-sweet

dreaming woman

you with the

ample breasts

and rounded belly

i love the way

your soft fleshy arm

makes a fine pillow

for your head

and the way your

generous hip curves high

as you lay on your side

calling to mind

all of the mountains

i have yet to climb

sanctuary

my heart is

heavy today

there is

so much pain

in the world,

so much pain

my prayer:

may all who are

in need of it

find sanctuary

today's sacred task

today

the

sacred

task

has

been

to

work

my

knotted

chain

of

thought

into

one

smooth

strand

of

contemplation

spider watch

round and round

i watch her traverse
the circuit of guy-wires
like an aerial acrobat,
she moves gracefully
from one radial line to the next
a slender leg stretches out
creating tension on the thread
as her abdomen deftly tucks under
lightly touching spinneret to web
another sticky strand successfully attached
and on she goes,

round and round
each movement made with
careful, rhythmic precision
her morning work is almost done now
she slows down
making her way back to center
weaving the final milky puffs of silk
that come from her body
into the tell-tale zig-zag
of a garden spider

verdigris

resist the temptation

to shine things up

the beauty is in life's patina

between two worlds

every night a portal opens

between two worlds

a curtain rises
but which side of it

i'm on remains unclear

until morning light

claims me for the waking one
yet how real and dear the other

elephants on parade

elephants on parade

inner light

in silence,

i wait for

inner light

that i might

see god

in the face

of foe and

neighbor

crowning glory

like a newborn's skin

the sky at dawn

pinks up slowly at first

before giving way

to the full flush of morning light

and on earth,

golden doulas bathe creation

tenderly washing away

the vernix of night

until only the glory remains

pay attention to your dreams

accept your dreams

as the gifts they are

cherish them as

you would letters

from your oldest

and dearest friend

honor them and

your dreams will tell you

all you need to know

corn moon mandala

when you wrap

your arms around

a full corn moon and

give a little squeeze

be prepared to get drenched

in melted butter dreams

adoration

when i hear your music

my heart opens and

my spirit soars

i am a bird in flight

riding unseen currents

of praise and adoration

deciphering

the hot coal of a dream

burned all the way through me

searing my memory

with indelible images

waiting to be deciphered

ordinary time

we gather on the porch at dusk

ready to shell the peas we picked

settling into creaking rockers and

scooping handfuls of slender goodness into piles

on the newspaper-covered table before us

we set about our sacred task

with four heads bowed low

over white enamel bowls trimmed in red

the gentle murmur of pleasant conversation

mingles with the steady thrum of the oscillating fan

creating a sound

like prayers at evensong

and we instinctively begin to slowly roll

each tiny green orb

through experienced fingers

masquerade

what is it
about the stroke
of midnight
what magical power
does it possess
that allows us

to take off
our masks
and how is it

that by a certain hour
we've put them on again

lectio divina: hebrews 13:1-3

continue loving everyone you know

as brothers and sisters

and as for strangers,

they, too, are family

show them kindness

and treat them well

in doing this

you just may find yourself

entertaining angels

and holding sacred space

for a divine encounter

remember those who are suffering

put yourself in their place

recognizing in their faces

something of your own

on the wings of the morning

"...where can i go from your spirit

or where can i flee from your presence

if i ascend to heaven, you are there;

if i make my bed in sheol, you are there

if i take the wings of the morning and

settle at the farthest limits of the sea,

even there your hand shall lead me

and your right hand shall hold me fast..."

psalm 139:7-10

via negativa

recently, i have been thinking a lot about what is known in art as "negative space" and the way it can become transformed simply by shifting one's focus. we go from being able to see only the obvious to seeing objects or patterns emerge that previously had been hidden to us. life is like that sometimes...we can and do learn a great deal from what is being said. however, we often learn more when we listen for and pay attention to the "negative space" and hear what is not being said. i'm reminded of a line from my favorite prayer by george appleton that says: "...show me the hidden things..." to be shown the hidden things is to be given a unique gift - namely - the opportunity for our lives (and the lives of others) to be transformed in ways previously thought impossible. a "negative space" can thus become a creative womb of sorts, giving rise to new ways of being, healing and wholeness.

a day at the beach

i remember
we took the tarnished silver spoons

with us to the beach

and dug sandcastle moats with them

until they gleamed and our arms ached

i remember
bodysurfing til we were limp as rag dolls
and collapsed on to the soft worn blankets
i remember
the musky sweet smell of coppertone
and the way we laughed as we
rubbed it on each other's backs
listening to WSAV play top 40 tunes
on my transistor radio
and waiting to hear the "tan tone zap" that
reminded us to turn over every 15 minutes
i remember
stopping by the sugar shack on
the way home for the best soft serve
ice cream cone EVER!
and being amazed at how much sand
can collect in one's bathing suit
after a day at the beach
and i remember
how good it felt to slip between

crisp clean sheets and go to bed early

because i was so worn out
from having fun

this is what it feels like

she stood there on the threshold

holding open the screen door

contemplating the consequences should she

defy her mother's edict to

"put your shoes on before you go outside!"

the sensation of bare feet on

weathered porch boards warmed by the sun

sealed her fate

this is what it feels like

to know my own mind, she thought

as the screen door slammed behind her

through a child's eyes

when i was a little girl

i assembled a congregation

of stuffed animals and dolls

then to my makeshift altar

i brought a humble offering

of the prettiest leaves i could find

and sang the only hymn i knew

in praise of god's creation

no sweeter communion

no better psalter

have i experienced since then

fly away home

as i sat by the fire

charting the night sky and

watching the sparks fly

heavenward

i could not help

but envy their freedom a little

wishing that i, too,

could fly away home

the sacramental instinct

there lives in me

the sacramental instinct

to find the holy in all things

and to cherish what is

threatened with extinction

resurrection

typically, i do not like to explicitly interpret my mandalas, but several people had asked me to write an explanation about this one, so i obliged.

Starting at the center..."in the beginning"....

"Let there be light..." Genesis 1: 3
"The light shines in the darkness..." John 1: 5

The radiating rings of red, orange, green and blue symbolize creation.

The jagged purple and yellow rings are symbolic of "the fall." "Cursed is the ground because of you...it will produce thorns and thistles..." Genesis 3:17-18

They also are representative of the crown of thorns placed on Jesus prior to the crucifixion. "Then the governor's soldiers took Jesus...they stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him, and then twisted together a crown of thorns and set it on his head..." Matthew 27: 27-29

The intertwining cords of scarlet and lavender are reminiscent of the robes the soldiers dressed him in. "They clothed him in a purple robe and went up to him again and again, saying, "Hail King of the Jews!"....When Jesus came out wearing the crown of thorns and the purple robe, Pilate said to them, "Here is the man!"

On top of and overshadowing all of this the cross. In each quadrant there is a larger cross flanked by two smaller ones. "Two other men, both criminals, were also led out with him to be executed. When they came to the place called the Skull, there they crucified him, along with the criminals - one on his right, the other on his left..." Luke 23: 32-33 "I have been crucified with Christ, nevertheless I live, yet not I but Christ lives in me..." Galatians 2: 20

The black backdrop speaks of the darkness that fell over creation at the time of the crucifixion. "It was now about the sixth hour, and darkness came over the whole land until the ninth hour, for the sun stopped shining..." Luke 23: 44-45

The egg shape represents both the tomb and new life. As you can see it is breaking open, and the colors of creation are coming forth - death doesn't have the final word. "Death has been swallowed up in victory." I Corinthians 15:54

The whole of creation has been reborn - made new - in the resurrection of Christ. "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead..." I Peter 1: 3

To the right of the egg is a circle which symbolizes the stone that was rolled away from in front of Jesus' tomb. The women coming to the tomb that morning to anoint Jesus' body did not know how they were going to remove it. "When the Sabbath was over, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James and Salome brought spices...they were on their way to the tomb and they asked each other, "Who will roll away the stone..." But when they looked up, they saw that the stone, which was very large, had been rolled away." Mark 16:1-3

The design on the circle is evocative of a few things: the day of Pentecost, the outpouring of the Spirit, the beginnings of the early church, as well as the irrepressible nature of Life...with a capital "L." "In the last days, God says, I will pour out my Spirit on all people." Acts 2: 17

In between the egg and the circle is a flame which represents the Holy Spirit, who hovers "over the waters" (depicted in the mandala by the color aqua) of creation and of baptism. (Genesis 1: 2, Matthew 3:16)

If you will notice, the pink and purple (colors used during both Advent and Lent) of the cross are repeated on the egg, as well as on the foundation pedestal undergirding the circle. This speaks of how far reaching the birth, life, death, resurrection and ascension of Jesus is. His life affects not only all of humanity, but all of creation as well.

The inspiration to create this mandala came to me as I was reflecting on my own spiritual journey, so it has a great deal of personal significance for me. My name, Stacy, comes from the Greek word Anastasia, which means "of the resurrection."

under the microscope

if i could, i would show you

a cross-section of my soul

then you would see

that like the pomegranate

i, too, am filled with seeds

rainbow seeds

the strength of memory

i wondered what would remain

when it seemed that

so much was being lost...forgotten

sitting with you in silence

you reached for my hand

and held it for a very long time

i hardly dared to breathe

not wanting to break the spell

when the tears came

i let them fall

you were leaving

and your struggle

was so hard to witness

for i could see

that in the last days of your life

you remembered

everything

push-me-pull-you

what was that you said?

"don't come."

but i came anyway

and you were happy

i didn't listen

then you said

"don't leave."

but we both knew

i had to go

you came to admire

my strength

not realizing that

like dr. doolittle's

push-me-pull-you

we shared

the same backbone

savannah

how can i explain savannah

her beauty transcends words

still, i search for them

knowing that you, too,

have such places of the heart

that place where

once you pass into her

your first impulse

is to weep for joy

imagine yourself there

and you will know

my city

my home

asana

sit down

there's something

you need to hear

pay attention to the wound

the thin red line is speaking

i come to the garden

gentle lady, mother of nine

widowed too young

no time to grieve, life had to go on

times were hard

in later years,

when you could take some ease

you planted the whole front yard

on clemson street with flowers

a little outpost of eden

you were already white-haired

and worn

when i came to know you

i loved the way you poured coffee

into the saucer for me

laced with sugar and lots of cream

you would pat my hand and say

"come sit near granny"

and i would snuggle up beside you

my head on your bosom

i did not know then

what i know now

how age and

the cares of this world

catch up with us in the end

how i wish i could roll back time

and join you in the garden

once again

morning glory

beautiful brief flower

born for morning

you fill me with longing

for the land of eternal day

lenten meditation

as i kneel to receive the ashes

i think of all the times

like dust from my feet

i tried to shake you

tried to make a break from you

and how you’ve clung

with ferocious tenacity

unwilling to let me go

til you’ve blessed me

with a reminder

of my mortality

and i leave the rail

with a limp

safely home

sometimes i feel as though

i've lost

my way

and i don't know

in which direction i should go

the next step to take

the right move to make

but if i'm still

my heart remembers
the way

and leads me

safely home

divine love

wrapped up in a warm embrace
held in such a tender way
and smiled upon with loving grace
that's how i see the world today

some might say i'm quite naive

and wonder how i can believe

such nonsense

call me crazy if you must

for there are days i would agree

with such a diagnosis

but today...today...my mind and eyes are clear

and i see evidence of

divine love everywhere

be mine

it was love at first sight
for me, at least

the day we met
in a third floor kitchen
on huntington street
you held out your hand
and said, "hi, i'm dan"
i knew in an instant
that you were the one

i wanted to spend my life with

rainbow quilt

as i lay beneath my rainbow quilt

my fingers trace its seams
in quiet reverie
each scrap i touch
holds a precious memory

and i marvel at how well
unseen loving hands

have stitched together

with silver threads of mystery
all my fondest hopes and dreams

resilience

i love being taken by surprise
by the resilience of certain things
like daffodils blooming in february
that refuse to wait for spring

a woman with issues

i was desperate for a cure

all my money had been tendered

"leave well enough alone" they said

but i had come undone

and sought to be re-member-ed

fernwood

her soul feels so thirsty

her spirit is parched and dry

she comes to the fountain in fernwood

and drinks a mystery there

the ancient seed within her

she waters with her tears

and though it still is winter

a tiny bud appears

taste of india

this morning, i am still feeling the effects of seeing the movie, slumdog millionaire, which my teenaged son declared, "the best movie, EVER!." although my praise and appreciation for it is a bit more reserved, i'd highly recommend it. the tempo of the film is a relentless assault on the senses and the psyche...much the way i imagine india herself would impact me should i ever have the privilege to visit there. the redeeming factor of the movie for me was its underlying sweetness, for slumdog millionaire, at its core, is a love story...an "against all odds" kind of love story that i find irresistable.

the turning point

on my journey

into wholeness

i bought a compass

and never looked back

what eyes fail to see

my fingers touched

holy braille

and found

love inscribed

on every cell

building stonehenge

we can only guess
why some things exist
no one takes notes
when things are obvious
and why leave blueprints
when you can leave monuments
only pilgrims keep searching
for footprints

spring of the eternal

i was walking down the driveway when i noticed water pooling under the house. i asked the clergywoman, one of three living there, if they had a leak. she said, "no, the water has always been there. don't worry."

the water has always been there. she seemed so confident...so sure...playful even. but water makes me nervous. especially when i find it in places where i think it ought not be.

her certainty had a calming effect, and i wondered...how does she know that? and...what is it like to live in a house with a spring beneath it? and not just any spring mind you...an eternal spring...one that has always been there.

why do the waters trouble me?

candy swirl

what does one voice sound like

when it rises in the sea

of a crashing crushing
thronging wave

of frail humanity

all the hopes and fears

and dreams

are bursting straining

at the seams

who can contain

such a cosmic candy swirl

communion

i am a child
not yet confirmed
sitting - well...
fidgeting in my sunday best
next to my mother
on the left side of the sanctuary
where an hour
seems longer than eternity
at communion time
she takes a few extra elements
from the plate as it passes
and presses them surreptitiously
into my small palm
and as she sips the welches
from the tiny glass cup
she makes sure to leave a few drops
the sacrifices she made for me
i'm only now beginning
to understand